Waitin for Santa

Problem (#FirstWorldProblems): I hate shopping. I hate grocery shopping, fabric shopping, clothes shopping (see RJ's "sometimes I forget you're a girl" quote), shopping for me, shopping for others. Come Christmas, it is a necessity.
Solution: Apply my 2nd greatest talent- procrastination (second only to sleeping, of course). Today, Christmas Eve, I started and finished my Christmas shopping. Given, there wasn't that much left to choose from, but it worked. Farmington wasn't busy at all; everyone else was doing things you should be doing on Christmas Eve.

Last night Megan and I re-lived our high school memories, which included a "hang out" at Walmart.

 Cute, right? That's what we thought. Then we looked at the fine print- where the license plate says "Land of Enchantment". They spelled "Enchantment" wrong. This is the quality of education in which I grew up. Joke-a-licious.

As long as I'm going off on the before-and-after pictures, here's another one. I helped Lexi with her ginger bread house last year and this year. They always turn out so...beautiful.

Keshmish Baa'hozho to all and to all a goodnight.

HOW BOUT DEM TEXAS GEHLS!

For the last hour, I've been thinking about something very important. Is it ya'll or is it y'all? Grammar gods please guide me to the correct placement of the apostrophe. Rather, 2nd grade teacher, remind me of the rules. The word is a contraction of "you" and "all". At first, I think that it goes between the two- ya'll, like in "it's". But what about "don't"? Why isn't it "do'nt"? That's how I'm going to start writing. Ohhhh now I see that the apostrophe substitutes the absent letter. This makes more sense. It's probably y'all. One thing is for sure- I miss my Southern roommates! Last winter I was the odd ball from the nott-South. One of my other favorite Southerners is this guy. I can't figure out how to embed the video, so you'll just have to click here!

If we were your kids, we'd punish ourselves!

That's what I thought of when I walked out of my interview today. "If you hired me, I'd fire myself."

What a horrible, horrible interview. I was advised to apply to be an EatTech at the MTC, which is the person in charge of the billing/ordering/paperwork/accounting. First of all, I hate accounting. Secondly, I don't even like the MTC. Thirdly, I don't even want to major in dietetics. Why did I apply? I have no freaking clue. For now, I'll just stick with my mindless minimum wage job.
The bad thing: I have to face my interviewer often. He's my TA,  he works at the MTC, and I help him with his after-school-program class. I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm the biggest idiot right now.
The good thing: I don't have to sign my life away until April 2013.

Also. All I want for Christmas is to skip the next 2 weeks. Mmm maybe 4.

Fin

I took my final for anatomy tonight. Not good. Ohhhhh well. At least now I'll have another 12 hours in my week. Because I took an oath with my own blood that I would not release any information about the final until Friday, I cannot say which structure I was clueless on (it would make this story a lot funnier). But I can say that I ended up writing, "For NARNIA!" as the answer.
Hm, my hair smells like cadaver. Now that I think about it, I remember leaning over one this morning and drenching the ends in it. Yummm. It's too bad I didn't do better in the class- I would have taken the dissection class for sure.  Here is my all time favorite structure of the body: arbor vitae- the tree of life.  

So here is my embarrassing story for the week. They've redone all the time clocks on campus and at the same time, they switched the back gate to the MTC from keypad code access to swiping your BYU ID. On Sunday, I was a few minutes late to work. For some reason, my card wasn't letting me in. I could have walked around to the front gate, which would have taken 10 minutes, and it was cold. Instead, I looked at the gap between the gate and the ground. And I crawled under it. Apparently, there are surveillance cameras and security came after me. Breaking in is a bad choice. That was probably more action than the security guards have had in a long time.

Reminds me of this great clip

I forgot I had a blog.

My reason for blogging is simple. I have been on campus way too long today and I am flippin done with school work for now. Unfortunately, I can't leave. I am not a fan of the whole 10pm lab thing, followed by lab at 7 the next morning. However, I am even less of a fan of failing a class 2 times. Summary: Jeffery's bored and doesn't want to do homework. (Click here if you don't get the reference).

BYU is a strange place. I like to think about the quirky things the students obsess with. I frequently ask my UNM friends if these things apply just to BYU, or if they're part of college life in general. Coincidentally, I found a blog that's dedicated to this topic, but it has since retired. Now I will make my own.

BYU students love:
1. Donating plasma. There's something edgy about it. Border-line prostitution? Earning money for sitting there? Health facilities are smart- "Let's set up 6 donating centers in the city where we can find young, active, healthy, alcohol/drug/STD free who are extremely desperate for money!" Everyone falls for it. Not me, though. Maybe I would had I not been diagnosed with malignant melanoma as a small child. Just kidding, that didn't happen. But I am studying that for my final.

2. Harry Potter. I dunno. Maybe it was just a Bloomfield thing. Only the Mormons and the uber-geeks liked HP. It wasn't cool, it wasn't hip, it wasn't respected. Then I come here and was blown away when I couldn't get a ticket for the midnight showing 3 months in advance. 42% of the posts on Overheard are references to HP. It's great.

3. Engaging in/making fun of PDA. People participate in this activity because there is no such thing as private display of affection here. And if there is, it is frowned upon. "Keep it clean, play it safe, don't go places by yourselves". Just flag it in front of the rest of the student body. I don't have a problem with his arm around her. I have a problem with them making out during firesides. "Stop twisting your arm awkwardly to put his chapstick on for him; he can do it himself. I'm just trying to listen to President Packer." I understand nightly date flings. I do not understand my neighbor who would constantly pretzel with her SI at twelve noon. Nor do I understand "library couples". I just want to read about the hepatic portal system. I suppose they don't realize everyone around them is gagging. Wuv twue wuv.

Postscript: My kidney dialysis diet ends in t-minus 2 1/2 hours. I can't wait to drink water. And eat a tortilla. And not eat unseasoned chicken for breakfast. And not count milligrams of phosphorus. I am soooo grateful for my healthy kidneys. Yee-haw! #Get at me H2O, Na, K, P.

New fame, new name

Procastination nation

Today my to-do list was two columns long. Because of an interesting night at the latin dance club (funny story) I slept waayyyyy too long. And then I got ready and watched football all day. Now I'm procrastinating even longer by blogging. Here is the New Mexico trip.

The zoo- with all 5 kids (including Pops).
I think I spent more time in Albuquerque than Bloomfield, which i'm completely fine with. I got to hang out with my high school bff- he took me on a 'tour' of UNM. Chilled with za brothers.



A couple weeks ago my mom and Cade came to Provo. Cade is one ripped 11 year old. He weighs as much as me and is just a few inches shorter. My terrific friend Casey took us canoeing. It was a great trip and was one of our last memories before I dropped him off at the airport for his China study abroad. I can't wait for his return January!

Llama llama red pajama

I'm not sure what an appropriate caption for this photo is.



Yesterday was Harry Potter's birthday so I went to his birthday party dressed up as my favorite character. Notice the AWESOME Dark Mark, courtesy of Jenn Siggard. If you're looking for a way to get every guy's attention who sees you, the way to go is the ever so lovely Bellatrix Lestrange.

My friend Patrick is an incredible musician who writes and sings songs that make me feel like I'm in heaven. I love walking into his apartment as he's jamming. Check it yo.

Mourning with Me Who Mourns

Previous to ChelaBela, my favorite possession was my camera. I cared so deeply for it, I even departed with it so it could be repaired. Little did I know I would never get it back. I'M NOT BITTER! For now, I'll put the blame on the ever-too-helpful Target salesman, Spencer. I want to drop kick the mail system Napoleon style. #GetAtMeMailman

Hired to serve those who are called to serve

I've been thinking about missionaries a lot today. Maybe it's because Fridays are the days I get most of the missionary letters/emails. Maybe it's because I see thousands of them every day. Here are my thoughts about right now.
* It's easy to tell who was ready to go and who was not. For example, today I saw my once-dear friend "Lars". He looked...miserable. Not that it's surprising, he wasn't doing things that were helping him go on a mission period. BUT he did go. Once he saw me his face changed to a slight smile. My supervisor was talking my ear off so I couldn't actually talk to him, but we had a strange telepathic connection for a second. I had this strange maternal sympathy for him. I hope things change, I hope he changes.
* And then there's Tanner. It's great that I get to talk to him via the mail system, email, and real life. I wish I could put him in my pocket forever. I will share some of his insights. He says in Japanese, they use the phrase "imashime o mamoru" for "keep the commandments", but it literally means to protect or defend the commandments. I feel a lot cooler when I use those words. He also shared a quote that I really like, "Never suppress the urge to do something nice for someone else."
* Missionaries are still people. Jackson still signs everything- #GetAtMe.
* I would hate the being at the MTC. Elder Jensen told me they always feel the Spirit because it's Spirit Prison. I believe it. Reilly loved it. I think he's weird.
*Although it's slightly distracting when I see someone I know every time I look up, I love seeing these guys on a regular basis. Miss em.

Summer Days Drifting Away

I can't help but engage in the sweet reminiscence of last summer. Every day I think, "On this day last year, I was doing...." So here's a blog to capture 10 great moments of my freshman summer- not in any particular order save it be what popped into my mind.

1. Manti with Reilly. That was...a good night. No further explanation will be given on this blog at this given time. Oh, and happy anniversary Matt & Aubrey.

2. It's always awkward living with new people at the beginning of the semester, especially the first time. I will forever treasure the night Launa, Jenna, Aimee, and I discovered we were all weird. This is Launa and I pretending to be dinosaurs. They also slipped us some interesting notes that I still keep.

3. Along these lines was the time we made our first music video. In conclusion, being weird together bonds us like no other. It can be found here.
4. On Pioneer Day, BYU hosted "The World's Largest Water Balloon Fight". Makes me smile.

5. Mentioned in a previous post, I had a great time at the Jack Johnson concert with Carmelle, Dave, and Nate. Drunk people look funny dancing. We look just as good intimidating them.
6. Super sleepover at Aimee's! We made delicious tacos, watched The Lion King, ran crazy through the neighborhood (literally), had a great time at Walmart, and tie-dyed shirts. The next day some of us went to Salt Lake to tour Temple Square and hit Gateway Mall.

7. Aimee's parents took us boating one afternoon. That was flippin fun. After, we went to the Mt. Timpanogos temple where Paul and Nate got to baptize and confirm all of us. It was a neat experience.

8. One afternoon Jenna, Nate, Paul and I were laying around in our hallway snapping silly pictures. Nate didn't even put up a fight when I beautified his face with extensive makeup. Hunger hit and we went to Olive Garden where the giggles didn't stop. The waiter thought Jenna and I were cute and served us well, sending home boxes and boxes of extra food. In return we slipped him a number, Nate's number that is. He had fun flirting with a boy the rest of the night.
9. One day Aimee and I woke up and did nothing. We literally sat in bed all morning. It was very stormy that day so we felt lazy. It was the best do-nothing day. I think we listened to the clean sections of "California Girls" about 80 times.
10. Our last night together was a great one. After finals, packing, and cleaning, we chilled in our hang out kitchen spot one last time. Nate- who has THE best voice I have ever heard- serenaded us on the guitar. Then we hiked the Y, unfortunately forgetting flashlights. We chilled up there for a while, seeing sooo many shooting stars. Carrie Underwood says it perfectly, "Sittin up on the roof, checkin out the moon and the city lights...they've been dreading this moment all summer long- the night before life goes on."

There's my tribute to the best season of my life. B21+12B forever!